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Friday, October 8, 2010

Advanced SystemSuckOlogy: The Magic of Foster Parents

Advanced SystemSuckOlogy: The Magic of Foster Parents

Believe it or not, I am only human.


That said, in order to do a blog like Legally Kidnapped, I have to set some boundaries for myself. For example, I can not get emotionally involved. So it's not that I don't care, it's that I can't. It's like a nurse who cares for the dying. How can you do a job like that day to day, involving so much pain and suffering? How can a doctor or a nurse comfort a elderly woman who at that very moment lost her husband after 50 years of marriage and have that that kind of situation be a regular part of their jobs? There are people who do that. The answer, you learn not to become emotionally involved.


I have people asking me about this blog, how can I deal with so much negativity on a daily basis without becoming burned out? All of these stories about systematic failures, institutional abuse, abuse of power, child abuse, death and lives being destroyed. Rarely do I post anything positive here. And a lot of what I read about and post here on a daily basis is sickening.


Just the other night, I was talking to Ms. Tran about just this sort of thing. She made an interesting statement. She said, "I used to have emotion, but they forced it out of me." And I know exactly what she's talking about, because I have to keep a similar distance between my own personal life, my feelings, and this blog.


So in all honesty, I have to admit that it takes an element of coldness in ones heart, just in order to do this kind of work. Does this mean that I don't care? Absolutely not. If I didn't care, I wouldn't work so hard to expose these people for the fakes and frauds that they are. If I didn't care I wouldn't work to expose the horrors or the injustices that families are forced to endure. There is a fine line here. It's something that one really needs to be faced with in order to understand. I do it for many reasons. I do it because they f***** with my family. I do it because I believe that it is the right thing to do.


Now, switching gears: Have you ever wondered how that mean old caseworker who stole your child is able to sleep at night?


Same thing.


You see folks, there are two types of Child Welfare Workers out there.
  1. Those who are in it for the long haul.
  2. Those who can't handle it and get out after a short time.
Thus accounting for the high turnover rate in the Child Protective Industry.

The workers who can't handle it, are the ones who do get emotionally involved. Emotional involvement leads to a condition known as Burn Out. Therefore, in order to maintain ones sanity, child welfare workers who have been on the job for years, must put up this same kind of a wall between their inner beings and all of the emotional insanity involved in the Legalized Kidnapping and trafficking of our children. On the other hand, it takes an element of caring, and for some it is the belief that it is the right thing to do.


So with many social workers, I do share this common phenomenon regarding the self-preservationist aspect of human nature. The difference is, I'm posting news articles on a blog and they're lying, cheating, and swindling you out of your own flesh and blood and bouncing them through and abusive system claiming it's in their own best interest, and a good many of them don't give a hoot about it. They're trying to advance in their careers and you and your families are simply a stepping stone on that path.


Now, as I'm sure you're all wondering what the point of all of this is, I got to tell you that I came across a video clip that on the surface appears to be two wonderful people being interviewed on this topic of helping our nation's most vulnerable children. A concept that I have no problem with. First, we have a wonderful woman who works to recruit foster parents, and a foster care success story who is a talented bundle of personality and also works to some capacity within the system. We have them here painting a picture of the rewards associated with foster parenting. WE HAVE THEM WARMING THE HEARTS AND MANIPULATING THE EMOTION OF TELEVISION VIEWERS, in the hopes that some of these suckers for a sob story will "open their hearts and their homes to a child in need."


Thus we have them selling you a line of bullshit via a method of emotional marketing.



Okay. Credit where credit is due.


This guy is good. It's just too bad that he's either been brainwashed and now sells snake oil, I mean children for a living or he's simply a total sell out who doesn't understand the value of family, because he never had one. Still, using a foster care success story in this way paints the picture that such outcomes are common.


You also got to love the batch of lies from the old hag. "and then know that foster care is temporary, you're helping children go back home, and become a part of their family." Now, I do I have to point out that this video clip comes from the state who raked in the most money from the Adoption Bonus this year?

This is where it gets interesting.
If you are considering foster parenting, or taking on a legal risk child think about whether or not you can handle these emotions with the potential loss of a child. As a foster parent you will not keep every child that comes into your home. You will have to say goodbye. Sometimes you will be fine with the decision, and may even ask for the child’s removal. Other times your heart will break at the loss of a child you love completely. The only way to avoid this is to not take these children into your home at all.
http://fost-adopt.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/saying-goodbye-to-a-child (you may need to copy and paste the link into your browser as adoption blogs had me blocked in the past.)
So what happens when a foster parent becomes emotionally involved?


Well for one, you'll have them thwarting your reunification efforts. You'll have them fighting to adopt, dragging it out in court and crying, "We're the only family the child has ever known!"



No agreement reached in the Baby Vanessa case; custody hearing set



And in many cases, you will never see your child again.


So perhaps this emotional capturing of the hearts of potential foster parents on media presented foster parent campaigns is simply a form of the Child Protective Industry preaching the wrong message. A foster parent who becomes emotionally attached to your child could be your greatest obstacle to you getting your kids back.


But hey, they gotta feed the beast to maintain the cash flow, right?

Whitney Walker prays for a second chance to get her three young children back

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